Feb 072018

As I wrote in my last post, MG and I were going to skip our annual winter trip to Florida, but…

First of all, we got better. We got rid of The Crud.

Second, important appointments MG had schedule for February had to be postponed.

Third, we were free to travel.

It was late Thursday night a week ago, and we were watching The Science Channel. Yes, we are that intellectual.

MG: What do you think about going down to Florida for a few weeks now that we have the time?

ME: When?

MG: Now,

ME: NOW!!!!

MG: Okay, Monday.

ME: [counting on my fingers, panic setting in] That gives me only three days to get ready!

MG: Piece of cake. You can do it.

ME: [jaw drop] Do you remember to whom you are speaking?

MG: Just focus.

ME: Me? Focus?

MG: Yeah, you. Focus and move faster.

ME: Surely you jest. How many years have we been married? You must know by now that focus and faster are not in my lexicon.

MG: So, try harder.


I groaned and gritted my teeth. I’ve been hearing the same song all my ADHD life. Focus. Move faster. Try harder. It doesn’t help. My Mr. Efficiency will never get it.

ME: I have appointments I’ll need to reschedule. I have wash to do and summer clothes to get out and freshen. Then I have to pack—and pack my computer case.

MG: It’s not the end of the world. Just pace yourself.

ME: What about the taxes? I’m waiting on a few 1099s and then I’ll be done. They’ll probably come while we’re gone.

MG: Not a big deal. You can finish when we get back.

ME: Prescriptions—I need new prescriptions from my doctor. The current refills will run out while we’re gone.

MG: Excuses, excuses. Call her tomorrow.

ME: What about the bills? [I picked up a few from my temporary winter office desk in the living room. I glanced at the one on top and grew pale.] Uh-Oh.

MG: I get a bad feeling when you hold up a bill and say “Uh-Oh.”

ME: It’s my driver’s license, dang it. I tried to renew it online but had a problem. I meant to try again but I forgot. It’ll expire while we’re gone.

MG: [closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose] Okay. We’ll go into town tomorrow, renew your license, and swing by your doctor’s office to pick up your prescription. I’ll even buy you lunch while we’re out.

I brightened a bit. Lunch out was always nice, plus we then weren’t hungry for dinner afterward and I wouldn’t have to cook. A win-win scenario.

Somehow, I managed to get everything done before we pulled out of the driveway on Monday morning, but there was a price to pay. In order to get it all done before we left, I didn’t get to bed until 2:00 a.m., and I didn’t sleep a wink because I was positive I forgot to do something. ::sigh::

Last minute is not my strong suit.


Jan 252018

In past years, MG and I would be in the Florida Panhandle by now, enjoying warmer winter weather than the winter weather in Michigan—albeit this year not warmer by much. Some southern states had almost as much snow one week this month as we did in the north. I suppose we aren’t missing much in the way of warmth this time around.

We decided to pass on a winter vacation down south this year for several reasons. Not being able to shake The Crud that’s going around is one of them. The Crud lives in the shadow of The Flu. If you escape The Flu, The Crud will pounce on you. Unlike The Flu, The Crud may not become lethal. It just makes you wish you were dead while you’re coughing your lungs up, and it just won’t go away—like certain politicians.

MG came down with it first. He caught it from our grandsons when we spent the Christmas holiday with them in North Carolina. His sinuses were as blocked as a bill trying to pass through a Congressional shutdown.

He was considerate. He slept in a guest bedroom so I wouldn’t catch it from him. I escaped its clutches for three weeks, but it finally caught up to me this past Friday. MG still has it, so we are suffering through it together now.

Aww, isn’t that sweet? If any one of you out there answered yes, you are a seriously romantic sentimentalist. Get help.

We have cornered the market on canned chicken soups. We’ve tried just about every variety. The original Campbell Chicken Noodle Soup, the kind we all ate as kids that doesn’t have any veggies in it, is MG’s favorite. I like the chunky varieties with veggies better. I don’t know what it is about eating chicken noodle soup that makes me feel better when I’m sick. It just does. Chicken soup is not just for the soul. The body likes it too.

We practically bought out the bulk supply of tissues at Costco and went through them at warp speed the way The Enterprise travels through space. In hindsight, I suppose we should have bought Kleenex® stock so we could get some of our money back.

It was with reluctance that I dug out the dreaded Neti Pot. As expected, MG turned up his nose at using it. Yeah, that was shameless of me. I couldn’t help myself. It was much too tempting, but yielding to that kind of temptation happens to be one of my super powers.

A couple of nights ago, my sinuses began behaving badly, channeling Niagara Falls, so I did make use of the Neti Pot myself. Eww, and I do mean eww, but it helped me to breathe through my nose so I wouldn’t look like the daily catch at a fish market.

Cabin fever has set in with a vengeance. Except for visits to the doctor and to the pharmacy, MG and I haven’t gone out much. I began to feel like a prisoner in my own home. I spent several days in a row in my pajamas curled up on the couch in front of the TV not wanting to do anything but drink hot tea and honey for my sore throat. I avoided watching any political news reports after a while because they made me feel homicidal.

The other night, MG and I decided to watch a movie on Netflix to cheer ourselves up. He insisted on watching The Shawshank Redemption. It’s a great movie, don’t get me wrong, but in my somewhat distraught emotional state, I felt a prison movie might not be the best choice. I mentioned that to MG, but of course he still got his way, the big baby.

I can tell you unequivocally that The Shawshank Redemption did not cheer me up that night—quite the opposite—but it did give me an idea about what to do with a clueless husband who selects a gritty prison movie to watch without taking into consideration that his crud-fighting, emotionally distraught, cabin-feverish wife is a descendant of Sicilians.

I believe you get my drift…

Jan 032018

I am a firm believer that a person cannot have enough friends, especially not enough good friends. Friendship, like marriage, is something you have to care about and work at to maintain. Unless a friend steals from you, deceives you, deserts you, betrays you, or turns out to be an ax murderer who tries to kill you, I see no reason to end the friendship. You certainly wouldn’t consider ending the friendship over petty differences either, right? For example, rooting for rival sports teams. Perhaps liking different genres of music, literature, or art. Preferring different types of cuisines. Dog lover versus cat lover. Kirk versus Picard. [Kirk! Definitely Kirk!] And so on.

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Nov 292017

As much as I love computers, sometimes they don’t love me back. When I bought my second MacBook Pro about six months ago, I received a six months’ trial Kaspersky antivirus subscription from the Geeks at Best Buy. Firstborn, my computer guru, warned me about Kaspersky because it was developed by the Russians. The Geeks said a Canadian company owned it. Well, it’s not as if it’s uranium.

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Nov 152017

When I went to work at an advertising agency in Manhattan, I was fresh out of college and still incredibly naive for someone my age at the time. I had no idea there was such a thing as sexual harassment.

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