I am not a morning person. Correction, I am not an early morning person. As such, early Sunday mornings present me with a serious challenge–getting to church on time.
I never thought I’d need a thesaurus by my side to watch the Detroit Tigers play. The TV sportscasters have a specialized vocabulary made up of jargon all their own, and they appear to be the only ones who understand it. I don’t, that’s for sure.
Take the term “barrel up” for example. It makes no sense. How is it possible to barrel up when there are no barrels anywhere on the ball field? All I see are baseballs, bats, and bases. Someone please point out the barrels. Even Macho Guy, my in-house translator, is out in left field on that one.
Most people, if they are fortunate enough to have a few coins to rub together, accumulate a lot of stuff in their lifetimes. Some accumulate more stuff than most. Others are obsessed with accumulating mountains of stuff of every kind imaginable. If you’ve ever watched American Pickers you know exactly what I mean.
There are three known drawbacks to collecting irresistible stuff that you find so fascinating that you absolutely must have it under your own roof so you may gaze on it lovingly and dust it occasionally.
O brilliant first draft. O miraculous manuscript containing all the exquisite phrases that sprang from my mind, fully formed like Athena from the skull of Zeus. O eloquent pages teeming with so many darling words, phrases, and scenes that I can hardly believe I wrote them myself.
You gotta love modern technology.
We can do things today that I only read about in science fiction novels or viewed in science fiction movies and television shows when I was growing up.
Take the smart phone for example. It’s a telephone, television, and computer all in one–and it talks. It’s Star Trek tech for real in the palm of your hand. You can take it with you wherever you go and use it just about wherever you are. Along with its larger sibling the smart tablet and its mother the notebook computer, it allows you to telecommute. You can be on the job without being at work. Case in point, a family reunion out of state this past weekend during which Firstborn and I turned our cars into mobile offices.
