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Matrimony » Jolana Malkston
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May 062015
 

I suppose it would be presumptuous of me to suggest to the clergy of Christian denominations everywhere that marriage vows are wanting in that the man’s vows lack an extremely important promise. Love, honor and cherish in sickness and in health till death us do part are important to be sure. Yet I firmly believe there should be a permanent addition to the man’s marriage vows.

The man should vow to be the spouse responsible for killing all manner of bugs, large or small, with or without wings, with or without venom, with or without stingers, bloodsuckers or not, wherever and whenever they may be found, day or night.

There is a very good reason behind that suggestion. Bugs creep the living daylights out of the average woman. Bugs even creep the living daylights out of the above-average woman.

Case in point: A few years ago, while having dinner in the kitchen with Macho Guy, I felt a stabbing pain at the back of my neck. [No, MG was not the pain in the neck I felt.] I cried out and swiped my hand hard across my nape. Continue reading »

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